Hajar’s Testimony

Hajar (26) experienced ritual violence in Germany, Belgium and Switzerland from the age of 0 to 14. “I was forced to torture others. And I did it for self-protection.”


How or through whom did you come into contact with ritual abuse?

I was sold into these circles by my own father, he was also a pedo-criminal himself.

What are the typical experiences you have had as a victim?

Typical experiences I had as a victim, was that I was raped, of course. by many men and also women, that I was abused for child pornography, that I was recorded while being tortured and raped as a child. I was forced to hurt others as a child. Rituals and killings took place with an ideological superstructure. That is, there were symbols to be seen, music played in the background, and sometimes people were dressed up.

Where and in what context did it take place?

All this took place in different places, including, of course, private homes and villas, and churches, castles, palaces, cellars, and there was also a lot more.

How do the perpetrators get the children to comply?

Already as a child, you’re taught that what they do is right. If you didn’t comply or you didn’t obey, you were punished very badly. I was punished very badly. I was tortured, in different ways, raped, my head repeatedly held under water, locked up for hours in the dark, beaten, tortured by electric shocks. They said that I would be killed if I didn’t listen… and if I didn’t do what they told me to. Among other things, I was also programmed, that is, by torture methods linked to triggers to obey and carry out what they told me to do. And I also knew, of course, at that time, that there was no escape anyway, that I was surrounded by these people, that I would get no help from anyone. I never got any help either. And actually, you act out of self-protection. And because you kind of want to disengage from it or make the best out of the situation.

What was your worst experience?

Among the worst experiences were the murders and torturing of other people. That has burdened me the most, and also that I myself was forced to hurt others through torture, threats, violence, and conditioning. That is what I find most terrible.

Finally, do you have a personal concern or message?

My personal message is that one day everything will change for the better, but we still need more people to support us, who listen to us, and who also want to help the children, who also want to prevent something like this from happening to more people, something so unbelievably cruel. And that a place is finally created for us in society.